How to remember peoples names
Sorry but what is your name again?
We have all been there before, the awkward situation were we have met someone new, perhaps at a new job or in the gym and have forgotten their name. Almost always they will remember our name making us feel even more guilty and embarrassed about forgetting theirs. We then go on for the next few weeks calling them ‘buddy’ or ‘mate’, dodging having to ask the dreaded question; ‘what is your name?’. This situation plays itself over and over again, and we never learn our lesson. Luckily for us there are various things that we can do in order to remember peoples names effectively.
It is well known that people love to hear their own name , and when someone addresses us by our name we can’t help but feel more respected by them. When someone new remembers our name we feel closer to that person, and are more obliged to trust them. Remembering peoples names also sets you apart from the crowd, as most people are generally lousy at it. If you want to set a good impression, remember the persons name and call them by it during the conversation. Many guys often get blown out of conversations by girls after forgetting the girls name. Girls often ask for their names as a simple test, in order to find out who they can trust. Dale Carnage has remembering names as his sixth principle in his best selling book ‘how to win friends and influence people’. If you can build up the skill of remembering names you can enhance your popularity tremendously.
There are various methods that can be used in order to remember peoples names, these methods could prove to be powerful with practice.
- Be more conscious during social interactions
The first method is by far the most simple one, just pay more attention during social interactions. Many people during conversations tend to be bad listeners, they often disregard what the other person is saying because they want their voice/opinion to be heard. This unconscious behavior happens more often than you would imagine, it is the reason many relationships do not work out. If you can slow things down, and listen to what the other person is saying you might catch their names.
2. Repeat their name to them
Another way to remember someone’s name is to repeat it to them as soon as they tell you. This is often neglected when dealing with someone with a name that we find difficult to pronounce. There is nothing rude about spending extra time making sure you get the persons name right, what is more rude is not giving them that time. Once you have their name make sure you say it again when fare-welling them, “goodbye Ignatius”, this will help you remember their name better.
3. Name Abstraction
A powerful way to remember someone’s name forever is to use what I like to call ‘Name Abstraction’. To do this you must think of the persons name and associate it with something abstract. For example if someone’s name is Mike you might imagine them in a boxing ring throwing jabs. Next time you see Mike the mental image that you associated with him will pop up in your head, which you will associate with Mike Tyson, and hence remember Mike. If someone’s name is John you might visualise them in snow on top of a huge wall, next time you see John you will remember Jon Snow from GOT, and hence remember John. The more abstract the vision and association the more likely you will be to remember it. Your memory only pays attention to things of importance in your life, as well as things that are out of the ordinary. You might remember the first time you saw snow vividly, but forget what you saw on the drive to work yesterday.This is why you must make you associations abstract, it helps them stay in your memory.
4. Write it down
If all else fails sometimes the easiest way to remember peoples names is to just write them down as soon as possible. This allows you to review peoples names, allowing you to remember them. This method can easily be utilised with smart phones. Just don’t let anyone see your list or you might have some answering to do!
Remember me forever
They say repetition is the mother of skill, and remembering names is a skill. The more you consciously practice, the easier it gets. The human brain is a powerful tool when utilised accordingly, it does not take much of the brains faculties to remember other peoples names. Do not be surprised if after practising these methods you end up remembering the names of everyone you meet. Perhaps the most gratifying thing about having this skill, is the look of amazement people give you when you still remember their name years on.